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Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Confession Time and Stuff

"I think the average if you look at your PokerTracker stats is that about 90%+ people are net losers in online poker. I think that about 92% - 93% is the industry norm. Yet, I know so few people who have ever lost playing online poker. "
-- Bill Rini
Hi, I'm a loser. And because I'm in denial, it's not totally my fault.

I wasn't always a loser. In the early days, poker was +EV. I was never a big winner, but I won slowly and steadily. I won the odd multi table tournament. I played break even to slightly positive cash games. I had bonuses to subsidize things. 2008, however, has been brutal. If I played a lot (or, as far as you know, for real money), I would be busto.

I am rusty. I play badly. Yadda yadda yadda. But you know what else? A lot of this is my ISP's fault.

Lately, I can't maintain any kind of stable connection and it's driving me NUTS. I'm sure it's no treat for the people seated at my table either - sorry about that. The thing is that nothing puts me on tilt faster or harder than having the stupid "trying to reconnect" window pop up every twenty seconds. Pretty much every tournament I've played lately has involved this kind of tilt which in turn results in stupid moves like shoving 97s.



So, as kind of a rare treat, I played the MATH last night. Er, I should say that I *tried* to play it. Thirty minutes in I was ready to throw my laptop out the window because of - you guessed it - connection problems. I was already tilted from the failure of what I felt was a well executed play - stupid random number generator - and this was the last straw.

I picked up a few chips early from - and was berated by - Donkette when I turned broadway with KQo from the button. My only defense is that nobody had to let me limp for 40 chips. Or let me have a free card to fill my flopped gutshot.

I then had what I thought was an ideal setup. I figured that ANIguy would be tilting after his three-barrel bluff was called down by Fuel. We got into it the very next hand. I flopped trips on a 668 board with two diamonds. He led out, I popped it, he called. The turn was harmless and I laid out a pot-sized bet of just under 1000 chips - with less than 1300 behind, he'd be committing himself. My read was flush draw. He called. River filled the flush - standard - and didn't boat me. I can't exactly fold to his "shove" of crumbs getting 9-1, but my read was dead on. Fail.

I did get most of those chips back from ANIguy a while later. He'd lost a big hand and gotten very short. I picked up my first decent pair - QQ - and was happy to call his open shove. JTo no good.

Somehow, my connection improved a bit, I slowly recovered from tilt and I even made it into the top 10 chip counts in the middle of hour two. Alas, I managed to blow it. I got moved to a new table, where PirateLawyer was raising at least 50% of the hands. His raises weren't huge - little more than minraises, really, but they were getting respect. He popped my big blind and I defended with plenty of chips and two suited cards. Yeah, the powerful Q8s. Whatever. If I hit, I'm getting paid.

Eight on the flop. I float. Eight on the turn. This is it, I'm going for the double. Nothing scary on the river. I shove over the top. Call. Of course he was A8o for the same trips, better kicker. Out somewhere in the middle of the pack. GG and all that.

My timing still sucks.

Hey, do you think I need to stop playing trips like they're the nuts?


I hope you all enjoyed a pleasant Memorial Day weekend (and for our Canadian and overseas friends, nyah). I spent somewhere in the vicinity of thirty hours working in my yard. I also managed to fit in two rounds of golf, three trips to Wally World, three to our local (Wal-Mart) competitor, two trips to Home Depot and one family function.

Needless to say, I could hardly move by last night. One reason I decided to play the MATH was because I could do so from a prone position and without moving too many muscles. Ow.

I need a vacation from my holiday weekend.


This just in: I run way better at contests than I do at poker. Thanks Byron!


Returning briefly to the opening quote, that's a pretty sobering statistic, isn't it? And if you can't believe a poker room manager for one the biggest online sites, who can you believe? I haven't looked at my PT numbers, but it feels about right.

I don't have a plan for turning things around. I don't have a course of action that will improve my game enough to beat the competition, the rake and the stupid RNG. You know what? I don't care all that much. A truly terrible attitude to have, but it is what it is. As long as I have no skills, no plan, no stable internet connection and no working bankroll, the game will remain nothing more than a sporadic diversion. New goal: Keep any losses to those of the happy meal sized variety.


As the BBT3 winds down, we have the usual slate of games. Tonight is the Skillz Series.

Also, don't forget about the Bodonkey - this series sometimes gets lost amongst the BBT3 hype and it's still wide open even as we get down to the very end.

And - this week is your last chance to enter the UNDERBETTING FOR VALUE contest. A juicy (lol) $11 prize is on the line, so get busy making people fold to your minbets people!

Last thought: For your own safety, please do NOT take any kind of advice on how to actually play poker from this blog. It will only cause pain. Infinite, infinite pain.


$mokkee said...

if winning $$$$ at pokah was EZ, the majority of players would be winners instead of losers.

-captain obv

Wwonka said...

I Switched from Charter cause They Suck and I was having the same Problems as you. Fuck Charter

Hope you get the issue resolved.

Bill said...

Yeah, it doesn't help when even the technology quits working for you :-)

Joaquin "The Rooster" Ochoa said...

dude, go get a beter plug in...or go to Starbucks and play...haha!