Thursday, April 24, 2008

Gone Fishin'

I'm fairly stumped as to what I'm doing wrong.

I'm not playing great poker. Much of the time I'm not even playing good poker. But I'm getting killed doing things that I have always believed are correct - that is, when I do play good poker.

Cash games. Are you not supposed to get as much money in the pot as possible when you're a 3-1, 4-1, 10-1 favorite? In situations like that I am just spewing chips right now and it's making me crazy.

Variance is normal. Variance is part of the game. Even as a 3-1 favorite you lose 25% of the time. I understand that. I accept that. That's a big reason why I play the levels I do - so that I can (at least in theory) handle the swings.

This isn't standard variance. It just isn't normal to lose 70%, 80%, 90+% of the time in those "big favorite" situations where I'm way way WAY ahead - and that's exactly where I am right now. Losing, losing and losing some more. It also isn't normal to lose a huge number of "coin flips" - the 50/50 or 60/40 situations. I haven't kept tabs on those, but I know I'm not running at expectation there either. And I'm not even referring to hands where I'm an underdog. Don't ask. Just don't.

I know that I should be thrilled when my opponents do retarded stuff - like, for example, they want to commit their entire stack on the turn with top set when I have the nut straight and the only flush redraw. I should PRAY for action in those spots. I don't want to become some kind of shell-shocked poker zombie that ends up just calling the turn in hopes that the board doesn't pair on the river - and then cursing and folding when it does. I want to maximize seriously +EV situations, not to minimize risk. "To get action you have to give action" - and I should want to give and get action when I'm ahead. Especially when I'm way ahead.

Except I always end up way behind. Poorer. Angrier. Frustrated.

Putting up - and possibly making your eyes bleed - lousy blog posts is super therapy. I always feel better once I've spewed my venom into the 'tubes, and last night was no exception. I slept just fine despite the massive beatdown. I'm calm. I'm collected.

I'm taking a few days off.

Time off never hurts. It may not change much - it certainly won't undo yesterday's results, for one thing - but it never hurts. So I won't win a BBT3 seat in the Riverchasers tonight. So what? In my current mental state I'm not capable of winning a $1 heads up sit 'n go.

Time for a brief break.

I'd like to say I'll be out there living life this weekend, but who am I kidding. I might squeeze in some golf but mostly I'll be doing work around the house. Maybe if I work on my attitude I might even convince myself that I enjoy it. Stranger things have happened - I mean, I once won some money playing this stupid game.

Poker sucks.

3 Comments:

StB said...

Go golf and then do some work. Sounds like you need to relieve some stress.

Buffalo66 said...

Do you keep a PT database? Run your last couple months through pokerEV software, that should give you some input towards the actual amount of soul crushing variance.

Plus it always gives you a bunch of nice charts to post.

kurokitty said...

A break is always helpful. Good luck on your return.